Okay, here’s what I don’t understand.

Why is it so much more socially acceptable to be stressed out over student loans, and financial stability, and starting a career young than it is being wanderlust, adventuresome and daring? I don’t understand the looks I get when I tell people that I left my extremely well paying job to work for a non-profit for a few months on the other side of the country for very little pay. Or why people think it’s odd that my sister gave up her managerial job to up and move to England to work at a pub. 

Like, thank God I have the most incredible and supportive parents in the world, because apparently these things are crazy. I guess… I guess I just don’t see why they’re so crazy. I’ve gained so many incredible memories and friends this year because of my choice to uproot myself, and the fact of the matter is, I may not have been able to put a lot of money away, but when I return to Vancouver in September, I have that well-paying job to go back to.

But so many people out here are so obsessed with getting a degree, with starting their career, with financial stability that they’re forgetting to live. It’s ridiculous how stressed out you can become thinking about the future, it’s almost like everybody’s forgetting to live right now… I don’t want that. I don’t want my future to become more important than today, because nothing about my future is secure, no matter how hard I work towards making it so. Nothing more than this very moment in secure. And in this moment, I’m happy for my fridge full of groceries, and the fact that I got to text my sister in England today.

There’s a freedom in not being obsessed with financial or career stability. You should try it. University… a career… money… none of it’s worth getting so stressed out you lose yourself. Just live… just fucking live.

I was seventeen when I lost my mind,
making friends with the devil and his lies.
Am I alive, or just breathing?